Talking You Off The Ledge Blog

written by Dana Simone Stovall

You Haven’t Been In Love Until….

Photo Credit: Unknown Photographer

As a #FemaleMasterpiece, I spend a lot of time talking to people about their emotional being and how love affects that state of being.  So here’s what I’ve come up with from those deep love dialogues to close out the month of love…February.

You haven’t been in love until….

You feel it deep in the core of your soul.  Your blood quivers like it’s simmering like a pot of collard greens with just the right amount of spice.  It’s the kind of love that puts a lump in the back of your throat that makes your mouth water and tears run down your face.

Tears?!  Yes, tears remind you that he/she waters your heart, mind and soul that helps keep that flame flickering and fighting to stay strong, but yet the tears merely kindle that fire and passion gently to grow bigger and bigger.

Bigger because he/she makes you think bigger, explore bigger, and dream bigger.  Who needs someone that only minimizes your expressions, finds the negative in everything, and has no balls of their own to leap beyond every supermoon, blue moon or harvest moon to reach the stars?

Starlight, star bright like a nursery rhythm because you haven’t been in love until you giggle like a five year old as you watch TV or play childish games in the family room.

Room! (Deep sigh) You haven’t been in love until you get that pure sinking feeling in the depths of your stomach when you see him/her across a crowded room and you get this look on your face of arrogance that reflects, that’s him (that’s her), ain’t he (she) fine as hell?

Hell, his (her) very presence as he works a room “shaking hands and kissing babies” reminds you of his strength, wisdom and influence that inspires everyone he (she) meets.  But the whole time you’re there, your hands never clasped each other nor did your lips collide.  It was truly your loving spirits from across the room that connected and touched.

T.O.U.C.H him (her) in ways that reflect that you adore him (her) and honor him (her), not violate him (her) or change that supple beautiful brown skin to colors of black and blue blemishes of shame and dominance. Oh yeah, been there, #MeToo.  Those hands should lay rose petals in the hallway to the bedroom. They should cut out the most intimate and creative designs that cost you nothing.  Your hands should always caress him (her) and glide across his (her) skin like you’re directing the flow of the ocean over his (her) body.

His (her) body is a temple, a shrine and reflection of how much he (she) love himself, his (her) health and his (her) well being.  He (she) works hard on those curves and keep just the right amount of fluffiness for cuffing season.  LOL! You haven’t been in love unless his (her) muscles or curves hypnotize you and put you in a deep trance.

This, my friends, is the essence of what is or should be infinite love.  Don’t stop at February, discover your true self and unleash that passion every day of the year.  Because you haven’t been in love until you and him (her) transform spiritually, emotionally, financially, and physically to live in infinite desire, passion and respect.

I am DanaSimone, and I’m talking you Off The Ledge, because keeping it real has no safety net.

Beautifully flawed,

The Ultimate Female Masterpiece, DanaSimone!®
Author, What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone
Talk Show Host, #DanaSimoneShow
#TalkingYouOffTheLedge
http://bit.ly/YouTubeLife
http://www.DanaSimone.com

Please visit my website at www.DanaSimone.com and follow me on social media. If you want more reality checks, purchase my motivational book on time management and fitness for women for only $10; it takes no more than 60-minutes to read – What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone

The Relationship Ain’t Real Until It’s Gone Through Four Seasons

All relationships start off good, make your stomach dance like butterflies, and you talk to each other with sugar-coated tongues. But as the weeks continue and you begin to learn each other’s habits and personal customs, things begin to crystallize and become more clearer as to the type of person you’re really with.

That’s why I’m a huge believer that every relationship should go through four entire seasons before committing to long-term plans (i.e. marriage, engagement, shacking-up etc). Just like the weather, trees, flowers, and the topography change in each season, I strongly believe that each person’s mood and behavior changes in each season as well.

You may not notice it or agree with me, but at 46, I’m a helliva lot wiser and more aware in recent years, especially after my divorce. For instance, in the winter time, I’m more inclined to be moodier or stay in the house because the snow or cold weather is stifling and hinders my gym visits. Plus, I hate being cold and bundling up in all those darn layers of clothing. So my boyfriend would need to aware of my seasonal mood and plan our winter activities accordingly. In addition, let’s say if you are a tax accountant or work in a field dealing with company financials, then winter/spring will be intense months for you because of the high demand and stress of that seasonal responsibility. Your mate would need to understand that and cater more to helping out or making your life a little easier during those months with errands, dry cleaners, cooking, laundry, sex etc….

Now, on the other hand, if you’re with someone that has a high stress level and moodiness all the time no matter what the season, then you, my friend, have to work a lot harder to decipher the qualities you like most about that person. LOL!

Once you’ve observed your mate for four seasons and think about the impact each season had on them directly, on you, and the relationship; it makes deciding which qualities are negotiable or non-negotiable for you to live with before the next four seasons begin.

During this time, it’s also easier to really think with your head and not your heart, if you aren’t so darn “thirsty” wanting to fall in love. Because the minute, you fall in love with somebody, you are more susceptible to think with your heart and not your head which is sooooo dangerous because your decision-making and discernment becomes foggy as hell since you so “in love.” As a result, the things that should have been non-negotiable, using your head, begin to be more negotiable, using your heart. #Whimp

So be excited about the relationship. Understand each other’s needs. Be aware of the seasonal behavior. Esteem and assist where you can. But don’t be no fool, cut your losses….before the ball drops at Time Square, before Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow, before the Easter bunny drops those eggs; before the fireworks blast off, before the witch rings your bell begging, or before Santa eats your milk and cookies. No matter when the season, just do it before it’s too late.

I am DanaSimone, and I’m talking you Off The Ledge, because keeping it real has no safety net.

What do you think? Does this makes sense? Let me hear from you below.

— DanaSimone!®
Author, What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone
Talk Show Host, #DanaSimoneShow
#TalkingYouOffTheLedge
http://bit.ly/YouTubeLife
http://www.DanaSimone.com

Please visit my website at www.DanaSimoneStovall.com and follow me on social media. If you want more reality checks, purchase my motivational book on time management and fitness for women for only $10; it takes no more than 60-minutes to read – What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone http://www.amazon.com/Whats-Your-Without-Getting-Outdone/dp/1478711779

New Year’s Resolutions are for Wimps… Do It Now Boo!

In 2017, I will not…
In 2017, I will start…
In 2017, I will be…

What da’ hell is that all about?! I’ll tell you what it is. Resolutions are merely placeholders for another excuse. I’m sorry, but they are. One might say, logically, that resolutions are a good starting point for people to change something or do something better. I get that. So if you start the resolution on January 1 and then by March 31, you’ve failed at pursuing your mission, then what? Do you wait until next January 1 to start over?! Hmmmm….

Resolutions, like diets, are moving targets that you will endlessly negotiate because you know there’s another “January 1” or “start day” that you can chose. Many of you have said that you are starting your diet on next Monday. But if you’re serious about losing weight, then why didn’t you start the diet yesterday? I’m just saying out loud, what you and others are already thinking.

Real goals need real commitment, not negotiators; and real dreams need real dream catchers, not dream chasers. If you aren’t willing to put in the work right now, at this very moment, then you aren’t really ready. So just stop lying to yourself. Now, before you send me hate mail, curse me out, or “unfriend” me; just sit back, take a deep breath, and think about it for moment. Gurrrrrl, at some point, you will stop negotiating non-negotiables.

I am Dana Simone, and I’m talking you Off the Ledge, because keeping it real has no safety net.

— DanaSimone!®
Author, What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone
Talk Show Host, #DanaSimoneShow
#TalkingYouOffTheLedge
http://www.DanaSimone.com

Please visit my website at www.DanaSimoneStovall.com and follow me on social media. If you want more reality checks, purchase my motivational book on time management and fitness for women for only $10; it takes no more than 60-minutes to read – What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone http://www.amazon.com/Whats-Your-Without-Getting-Outdone/dp/1478711779

Secure Your Oxygen Mask First…

We’ve all heard those infamous words from the flight attendant, “…if you’re traveling with a child or next to someone that needs assistance, secure your mask first, then assist them.” As further defense for the selfish discussion I present in my book, the meaning behind this phrase is perfect reasoning to learning to become more selfish with your time and efforts as it relates to dealing with other people.

One of the reasons this statement is made is because if you try to assist someone else without proper oxygen, you pose more harm to yourself and run the risk of passing out. Hmm, look at it this way, if you aren’t happy or healthy (i.e. “oxygenated”), how in the heck do you expect to make someone else happy or take care of them in an ideal frame of mind?

Life is about taking care of you first, then everybody else is secondary. Remember that, the next time you decide to run an errand or cook for grown people instead of going to the gym or scheduling an overdue doctor’s appointment. When you know better, you do better.

Talking You Off The Ledge, because keeping it real has no safety net”

— DanaSimone!®
Author, What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone
Talk Show Host, #DanaSimoneShow
#TalkingYouOffTheLedge
http://www.DanaSimone.com

Upgrade Yourself to 2.0

When you look in the mirror, do you cry or smile? Hmmmm…

When Apple or Microsoft decides that the current hardware or software is tired, outdated, or doesn’t function at optimal performance, what do they do? THEY UPGRADE IT! Many women continue to tell me that they don’t like the person that they’ve become. They’ve lost their identity. They do everything for everybody else. And they simply don’t know who they are anymore. Almost sounds like an acute case of amnesia. What use to be a girl on fire is now a 1.0 woman with barely a flicker.

If you’ve caught a case of amnesia, why not UPGRADE yourself to 2.0. Ask yourself. When did sweatpants become my entire wardrobe? Where is my comb? Why is my makeup dried up? Why are my clothes too small? If any of these thoughts cross your mind regularly, then it’s time for you to UPGRADE yourself to 2.0 because the 1.0 you is no longer cute, sexy, empowered, or attractive. In other words, you’re not functioning at optimal performance.

I realize you may think you are too busy to make these changes, but it only takes one download and restart of your current thinking to make this happen. If you got time to exhaust yourself with everybody else’s life, then you owe it to yourself to expend a little of that on you. Now go ahead, Click DOWNLOAD & RESTART in your mind right now. And I dare you to AGREE to live by your new terms and conditions.

Talking You Off The Ledge, because keeping it real has no safety net”

— DanaSimone!®
Author, What’s In Your 24? How To Get It Done Without Getting Outdone
Talk Show Host, #DanaSimoneShow
#TalkingYouOffTheLedge
http://www.DanaSimone.com